上海高考概要写作专题ppt课件

CONTENTS目录概要写作评分标准及得分要点01概要写作得分技巧02CONTENTS目录概要写作评分标准及得分要点01概要写作得1CONTENTS目录概要写作评分标准及得分要点01概要写作得分技巧02CONTENTS目录概要写作评分标准及得分要点01概要写作得2 评分标准档次内容语言A55B44C33D22E11F00 评分标准3评分标准1.本题总分为10分,其中内容5分,语言5分。2.评分时应注意的主要方面:内容要点、信息呈现的连贯性和准确性。3.词数超过60，酌情扣分。评分细则评分标准1.本题总分为10分,其中内容5分,语言5分。4内容部分A.能准确、全面地概括文章主旨大意,并涵盖主要信息。语言部分A.能用自己的语言连贯、正确地表述。A档给分要求评分标准内容部分A档给分要求评分标准5Moustache（胡子）for Cash “Movember”,as the annual event is known,sees men in countries including the UK,US and Australia grow out their facial hair while collecting sponsorship money from friends,family and colleagues,with the money going to cancer charities.The month of no shaving began unofficially in 2003,when a pair of men from Australia persuaded their family to join them in growing a moustache in order to encourage men to get themselves checked for cancer,which is seen as distasteful by some males.A year later,the group decided to set up the Movember Foundation,asking friends and colleagues to offer donations of money to support their efforts,and raised a massive A$54,000 which was shared between a number of health projects.With thanks most likely to social media,Movember soon went global and the foundation now operates worldwide,having raised over 440 million since 2004.The effects of the fundraising are wide-reaching,which had made a significant discovery in the treatment of cancer.The issue of some men being too self-willed to visit their doctor for a checkup,or perhaps being raised in a culture of“tough it out”,has led some males to neglect their health,which may mean it could be too late if something potentially deadly did develop.However,Movember is helping to break down the shame of male health by making it more accessible,meaning that men are more likely to visit their doctors.They found a way to appeal to men in a way that other campaigns just dont with a sort of blokey jokiness.blokey:behaving in a way that is supposed to be typical of men,especially men enjoying themselves in a group.”“Its success is due to its way to have men visit their doctors with blokey jokiness.（要点5）Men grow moustache for money used for cancer charities in Movember.（要点1）In 2003,two men started Movember.（要点2）In 2004,the foundation was set up.（要点3）Since then it has gone global and raised lots of money.（要点4）Moustache（胡子）for Cash “Mo6Movember is an annual event when men stop shaving to raise money for cancer charities.Some Australia men first started it to encourage men to do cancer checks regardless of discrimination.Thanks to social media,Movember spreads globally,resulting in advancement in cancer treatment.The aim of Movember is to provide an easy access to checkups for men.(58)3+4=71“Movember”,an annual event started in Australia in 2003 appeals to mens to grow out moustache to raise money for cancer charities.With the help of media it spreads worldwide and help humans treat cancer.Movember helps to break down mens shame of visiting doctors through blokey jokiness to let men to concern about their health.(56)4+3=72评分范例语言连贯语法错误缺少要点2和要点3缺少要点3内容部分B.能准确概括文章主旨大意，但遗漏个别主要信息。（4分)C.能概括文章主旨大意，但遗漏部分主要信息。（3分)语言部分B.能用自己的语言较连贯、正确地表述，但有个别语言错误。（4分)C.基本能用自己的语言连贯、正确地表述，但连贯性较差，且有少量不影响表意的语言错误。（3分)Movember is an annual event wh7“Movember”is an annual event encouraging men to grow out their moustache while collecting money for cancer charities.The event is initially launched by a pair of men who set up the Movember Foundation a year later,which has raised much money and operates worldwide now.Movember can help man breaking down the shame of male health by making it more accessible,which is helpful to cancer treatment.(68)4+3-1=63“Movember”sees men grow out their facial hair.The issue of some men being raised in a culture of“tough it out”has led some women to neglect their health.However,Movember is helping to break down the shame of male health.They found a way that men enjoying themselves in a group to appeal to men.(57)1+1=24评分范例字数限制内容及语言 缺少要点5只有要点1和要点5部分关键词没有用自己的话表述内容部分E.几乎不能概括文章的主旨大意，未涉及文中有意义的相关信息。(1分)语言部分E.几乎不能用自己的语言连贯、正确地表述。(1分)“Movember”is an annual event 8CONTENTS目录概要写作评分标准及得分要点01概要写作得分技巧02CONTENTS目录概要写作评分标准及得分要点01概要写作得9Concise!1Determine the type of writing and identify the topic as well as the authors purpose.Divide the passage&summarize the main idea of each part.Determine&Divide 3Add some transitional words to make the passage smooth.Check the summary.(tense,spell,etc.)Add&Check2Highlight the key information.Rewrite the same meaning.(using your own words,phrases or structures)Highlight&RewriteSummary StepsConcise!1Determine the type10030102衔接（照应、替代、省略、连接和词汇衔接）逻辑同义转换:近义词、同义词等替换句子重构:调整词类、时态、语态等语言提炼（删除细节、删除具体例子、避免重复）整合要点Skills of Summary Writing030102衔接逻辑同义转换:近义词、同义词等替换语言提炼11Part 1段落概括Part 1段落概括12PRACTICE1However,more research is called for to ensure its security.But more research is needed to assure its safety.(2017崇明区一模)同义转换PRACTICE 1However,more resear13PRACTICE2People read poems for enjoyment as well as academic purposes.Why do we read poetry?First obvious one:because we enjoy it.The only other reason is for academic purposes,and thats not why this is here.(2017奉贤区二模)H&RA&CPeople read poems for enjoyment.People read poems for academic purposes.as well as/and 调整词类PRACTICE 2People read poems fo14PRACTICE3The best strategy to achieve good results in the exam is to study books early.So,its the exam time again have you done the necessary work to get good marks?Sleeping with the textbook under the pillow in the hope that knowledge will be magically absorbed into your brain as you sleep doesnt work.The best strategy is to space your practice out,rather than craw(死记硬背)it all together.It means hit the books early!(2017虹口区一模)H&RA&Cto achieve good results to study books early提炼（删除细节、删除具体例子、避免重复）PRACTICE 3The best strategy to15PRACTICE4An interesting story motivates/inspires us to read continuously,for it reflects our real lives.A good story encourages us to turn the next page and read more.We want to find out what happens next and what the main characters do and what they say to each other.We may feel excited,sad,afraid,angry or really happy.This is because the experience of reading or listening to a story is much more likely to make us feel that we are part of the story,too.Just like in our real lives,we might love or hate different characters in the story.Perhaps we recognize ourselves or others in some of them.Perhaps we have similar problems.(2017宝山区一模)H&RA&CforAn interesting story motivates/inspires us to read continuously it reflects our real lives提炼（删除细节、删除具体例子、避免重复）PRACTICE 4An interesting story16PRACTICE5A study shows work still upsets people though companies are trying to make workplaces fun In order to make their employees happier,companies around the world have been busy installing play equipment in the workplace.Table football,computer games and action figures have become common in some workplaces.Despite all this effort,unfortunately,work still makes people unhappy.According to a study by the London School of Economics,the place where people feel most miserable is work.(2017崇明区二模)D&DH&RA&Cthoughcompanies are trying to make workplaces funwork still upsets people 调整词类PRACTICE 5A study shows work s17Part 1不同体裁概要写作Part 1不同体裁概要写作18概括的形式 文体主题句支撑句议论文记叙文说明文文章论点（一句）文章论据（两三句）故事的写作目的/主题（一句）故事大意（两三句）说明的对象/观点/现象解释/分述概括的形式 文章论点（一句）文章论据（两三句）故事的写作目的19 Example 1 Getting up early has been regarded as a good habit since ancient times.Many years ago,people thought that if we went to bed early and get up early,we would be energetic the whole day.Therefore,getting up early is of great importance to us all.In fact,morning is the best time of a day.In the morning,the air is the freshest and people are usually in the best conditions.Many of us may have the experiences that we memorize some things more quickly and accurately in the morning than any other time of the day.If we do some morning exercise or only take a short walk in the morning,we can build our bodies and become much healthier.Also we will have enough time to make a plan and get ready for our work or study of the day if we get up early.However,if we get up late,we will probably have to do everything in a great hurry.Let us remember getting up early is a good habit and try our best to keep it.If we stick to getting up early every day,we will certainly benefit a lot from it.D&D议论文D&D Example 1D&D议论文D&D2021论点 论据议论文概括的形式3结论 21论点 论据议论文概括的形式3结论 21 Getting up early has been regarded as a good habit since ancient times.Many years ago,people thought that if we went to bed early and get up early,we would be energetic the whole day.Therefore,getting up early is of great importance to us all.In fact,morning is the best time of a day.In the morning,the air is the freshest and people are usually in the best conditions.Many of us may have the experiences that we memorize some things more quickly and accurately in the morning than any other time of the day.If we do some morning exercise or only take a short walk in the morning,we can build our bodies and become much healthier.Also we will have enough time to make a plan and get ready for our work or study of the day if we get up early.However,if we get up late,we will probably have to do everything in a great hurry.Let us remember getting up early is a good habit and try our best to keep it.If we stick to getting up early every day,we will certainly benefit a lot from it.D&D议论文D&D论点论据1论据2论据3结论 Getting up early has been 22H&R Getting up early has been regarded as a good habit since ancient times.Many years ago,people thought that if we went to bed early and get up early,we would be energetic the whole day.Therefore,getting up early is of great importance to us all.In fact,morning is the best time of a day.In the morning,the air is the freshest and people are usually in the best conditions.Many of us may have the experiences that we memorize some things more quickly and accurately in the morning than any other time of the day.If we do some morning exercise or only take a short walk in the morning,we can build our bodies and become much healthier.Also we will have enough time to make a plan and get ready for our work or study of the day if we get up early.However,if we get up late,we will probably have to do everything in a great hurry.Let us remember getting up early is a good habit and try our best to keep it.If we stick to getting up early every day,we will certainly benefit a lot from it.getting up early in the morning is a good habit（删除细节、删除具体例子）a better memory（同义转换、调整词类）better preparation for the day（同义转换、调整词类）healthier body（句子重构）benefit us a lotHighlight the key information and rewrite论点论据1论据2论据3结论H&R Getting up early has be23A&Cgetting up early in the morning is a good habit a better memorybetter preparation for the dayhealthier body议论文benefit us a lotgetting up early is a good habit and try our best to keep itThe passage mainly tells us getting up early in the morning is a good habit that will benefit us a lot.Add some transitional words 删除，避免重复论点论据结论It enables us to have a better memory,healthier body and better preparation for the day.A&Cgetting up early in the mor2421论点 论据议论文概括的形式3结论 getting up early in the morning is a good habit a better memorybetter preparation for the dayhealthier body benefit us a lotgetting up early is a good habit and try our best to keep it Possible answer:The passage mainly tells us getting up early in the morning is a good habit that will benefit us a lot.It enables us to have a better memory,healthier body and better preparation for the day.21论点 论据议论文概括的形式3结论 getting up 25上海高考概要写作专题ppt课件26Concise!1Determine the type of writing and identify the topic as well as the authors purpose.Divide the passage&summarize the main idea of each part.Determine&Divide 3Add some transitional words to make the passage smooth.Check the summary.(Tense,spell,etc.)Add&Check2Highlight the key information.Rewrite the same meaning.(using your own words,phrases or structures)Highlight&RewriteSummary StepsConcise!1Determine the type27Example 2 Hope Nothing in my life had prepared for what I had to do.Choosing my words carefully,and fighting to stay calm,I told my 4-year-old daughter that her grandmother had suffered a stroke（中风）,that she was unconscious,and that the doctors said she would probably never wake up.As she moved closer to me,Amelia looked at me,eyes bright,and said,“Maybe Grandma will be okay.“Maybe she will,“I said,keeping back the tears.But I knew better.I was flying up to Mytle Beach,South Carolina,from our Florida home in the morning to say good-bye to my mom.The rest of that awful week,I joined my brother and father sitting by my mothers side in the hospital room.I held her hand and talked to her.I told her that we still needed her.I told her that it wasnt time to leave yet.I told her how much I loved her.And I told her that her little granddaughter,Amelia,believed that shed get better.The doctors,with all years of training and experience,offered no hope for recovery.The damage was simply too extensive.A couple of weeks later,an odd thing happened.Mom woke up!And then she preserved through a long and tough process of restoration to health,during which she had to learn to walk,read,and write all over again,and eventually returned home to Dad.The only one who wasnt shocked was Amelia.The doctors couldnt explain it.Amelia didnt need to.Hope came as naturally to her as possible.So why are we so afraid to hope sometimes?Maybe its because over the years,lifes disappointments can turn us to disillusionment（理想破灭）.How many times have you heard someone say,“Hope for the best,expect the worst?”Thats not really hope at all.Hope is being able to look at our world with all of the joy and wonder of a child.D&D记叙文D&DExample 2 HopeD&D记叙文D&D28记叙文概括的形式1叙事2结果3意图(who did what)记叙文概括的形式1叙事2结果3意图(who did what29Hope Nothing in my life had prepared for what I had to do.Choosing my words carefully,and fighting to stay calm,I told my 4-year-old daughter that her grandmother had suffered a stroke（中风）,that she was unconscious,and that the doctors said she would probably never wake up.As she moved closer to me,Amelia looked at me,eyes bright,and said,“Maybe Grandma will be okay.“Maybe she will,“I said,keeping back the tears.But I knew better.I was flying up to Mytle Beach,South Carolina,from our Florida home in the morning to say good-bye to my mom.The rest of that awful week,I joined my brother and father sitting by my mothers side in the hospital room.I held her hand and talked to her.I told her that we still needed her.I told her that it wasnt time to leave yet.I told her how much I loved her.And I told her that her little granddaughter,Amelia,believed that shed get better.The doctors,with all years of training and experience,offered no hope for recovery.The damage was simply too extensive.A couple of weeks later,an odd thing happened.Mom woke up!And then she preserved through a long and tough process of restoration to health,during which she had to learn to walk,read,and write all over again,and eventually returned home to Dad.The only one who wasnt shocked was Amelia.The doctors couldnt explain it.Amelia didnt need to.Hope came as naturally to her as possible.So why are we so afraid to hope sometimes?Maybe its because over the years,lifes disappointments can turn us to disillusionment（理想破灭）.How many times have you heard someone say,“Hope for the best,expect the worst?”Thats not really hope at all.Hope is being able to look at our world with all of the joy and wonder of a child.D&D记叙文D&D叙事结果意图HopeD&D记叙文D&D叙事结果意图30H&RHope Nothing in my life had prepared for what I had to do.Choosing my words carefully,and fighting to stay calm,I told my 4-year-old daughter that her grandmother had suffered a stroke（中风）,that she was unconscious,and that the doctors said she would probably never wake up.As she moved closer to me,Amelia looked at me,eyes bright,and said,“Maybe Grandma will be okay.“Maybe she will,“I said,keeping back the tears.But I knew better.I was flying up to Mytle Beach,South Carolina,from our Florida home in the morning to say good-bye to my mom.The rest of that awful week,I joined my brother and father sitting by my mothers side in the hospital room.I held her hand and talked to her.I told her that we still needed her.I told her that it wasnt time to leave yet.I told her how much I loved her.And I told her that her little granddaughter,Amelia,believed that shed get better.The doctors,with all years of training and experience,offered no hope for recovery.The damage was simply too extensive.(who did what)my little daughter,Amelia,full of hope about my mothers strokeDoctors were pessimistic about my mothers strokeour family gathered to bid farewell to her in hospitalI passed on Amelias hope要点整合同义转换叙事Highlight the key information and rewriteH&RHope(who did what)my littl31H&RHope A couple of weeks later,an odd thing happened.Mom woke up!And then she preserved through a long and tough process of restoration to health,during which she had to learn to walk,read,and write all over again,and eventually returned home to Dad.The only one who wasnt shocked was Amelia.The doctors couldnt explain it.Amelia didnt need to.Hope came as naturally to her as possible.So why are we so afraid to hope sometimes?Maybe its because over the years,lifes disappointments can turn us to disillusionment（理想破灭）.How many times have you heard someone say,“Hope for the best,expect the worst?”Thats not really hope at all.Hope is being able to look at our world with all of the joy and wonder of a child.she recoveredshe came back home after a period of restoration Hope does bring people in trouble amazement.同义转换结果意图Highlight the key information and rewriteH&RHope she recoveredshe came 32A&Cmy little daughter,Amelia,full of hope about my mothers strokeDoctors were pessimistic about my mothers strokeour family gathered to bid farewell to her in hospitalI passed on Amelias hope she recoveredDoctors were pessimistic about my mothers stroke while my little daughter,Amelia,full of hope.I passed on Amelias hope when our family gathered to bid farewell to her in hospital.Add some transitional words Incredibly,she recovered and came back home after a period of restoration.叙事结果意图 Hope does bring people in trouble amazement.she came back home after a period of restorationA&Cmy little daughter,Amelia,33记叙文概括的形式(who did what)Doctors were pessimistic about my mothers stroke while my little daughter,Amelia,full of hope.I passed on Amelias hope when our family gathered to bid farewell to her in hospital.Incredibly,she recovered and came back home after a period of restoration.Hope does bring people in trouble amazement.Possible answer:Doctors were pessimistic about my mothers stroke while my little daughter,Amelia,full of hope.I passed on Amelias hope when our family gathered to bid farewell to her in hospital.Incredibly,she recovered and came back home after a period of restoration.Everyone was astonished except Amelia.Hope does bring people in trouble amazement.(55 words)1叙事2结果3意图记叙文概括的形式(who did what)Doc34Example 3 Around the world,music therapy(疗法)is being used to treat different medical conditions and illnesses.Some of the ways people use music therapy are to reduce pain,such as in childbirth or during cancer treatments,or to stimulate brain activity after an injury or money loss.Music therapy has also been successful in aiding children to overcome disabilities.Children can move their bodies with the music and stamp along to the beat.Why is music a useful therapy?Music is soothing and relaxing,but it also stimulates our brains.Emotionally and physically,we respond to the sounds of music.But the complexity of music(the different tempos,rhythms,melodies and harmonies)provokes(激发)the biggest response.Thus,classical music is most typically used for therapies due to complex sounds and patterns.Although rap or hip hop might be fun to listen to,its unlikely that such styles of music would produce the same kind of therapeutic effect.Playing a musical instrument rather than