中考英语作文讲评课(上海版)课件

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Writing1Leaving school(毕业时分)(毕业时分)Growing pains and gains(成长的烦恼与欢乐)(成长的烦恼与欢乐)I have a dream(我有一个梦想)(我有一个梦想)Things I hate to do(我不喜欢。)(我不喜欢。)Love around me(我身边的爱(我身边的爱)I want to do something for my school(我为学校做件事)我为学校做件事)Im proud of myself(我为自己感到自豪)(我为自己感到自豪)1.与生活相关与生活相关2.与与“我我”相关相关Leaving school(毕业时分)与生活相关2Write at least 60 words about the topic The best way to make me happy.(以“最能使我快乐的方法”为题,写一篇不少于60个词的短文,标点符号不占格)The following points are for your reference:(所给提示仅供参考)1.What are the ways to make you happy?2.Which way do you think is the best one to make you happy?3.Why do you feel happy in this way?(give at least two reasons)Write at least 60 words about 3内容(内容(7分)分)+语言(语言(8分)分)+文采(文采(3分)分)一、认真审题,结构合理一、认真审题,结构合理*写什么写什么(题目,参考问题)题目,参考问题)内容(7分)+语言(8分)+文采(3分)一、认真审题,结构合4What should we write about?What shouldnt we(only)write about?Free talk1.My school life 2.My dream teacher 3.The thing I hate to do 4.My opinions of keeping pet dogs 5.The best way to make me happyWhat should we write about?Wh5内容(内容(7分)分)+语言(语言(8分)分)+文采(文采(3分)分)一、认真审题,结构合理一、认真审题,结构合理*写什么写什么(题目,参考问题)题目,参考问题)内容(7分)+语言(8分)+文采(3分)一、认真审题,结构合6Write at least 60 words about the topic The best way to make me happy.The following points are for your reference:(所给提示仅供参考)1.What are the ways to make you happy?2.Which way do you think is the best one to make you happy?3.Why do you feel happy in this way?(give at least two reasons)Write at least 60 words about 7 The best way to make me happy is achieving good marks.I think this way is the best one to make me happy because it is the easiest ways and it can improve my ability so I think it is the best way.In this way,I can get some prizes,so I will feel happy,whats more it can also make my parents happy.The following points are for your reference:(所给提示仅供参考)1.What are the ways to make you happy?2.Which way do you think is the best one to make you happy?3.Why do you feel happy in this way?(give at least two reasons)内容不全内容不全 The best way to make me ha8 there are a lot of ways to make me happy.The best way to make me happy is to play basketball.To play computer games is also a way to make me happy.Everyday we have PE lesson.These are a lot of interests in it.So I feel happy in this way.The following points are for your reference:(所给提示仅供参考)1.What are the ways to make you happy?2.Which way do you think is the best one to make you happy?3.Why do you feel happy in this way?(give at least two reasons)内容不全内容不全 there are a lot of ways to9 the best way to make me happy is to help another.When I feel sad,I can help another,because I hope the others happy.I can help old people cross the road and play with small children.In this way I feel another happy,then I also will happy.Help others not only make me happy,but also make others happy.The following points are for your reference:(所给提示仅供参考)1.What are the ways to make you happy?2.Which way do you think is the best one to make you happy?3.Why do you feel happy in this way?(give at least two reasons)内容不全内容不全 the best way to make me ha10The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays.What do you think of this article?内容不全内容不全1.What was the thing you did in the winter holidays?(1)2.Give some descriptions about it,such as where/when/how /who,etc.(4)3.Why do you think its the most unforgettable thing you did?(2)The winter holidays are one of the most exciting holidays in the year.The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays is making a birthday cake with my mother on my birthday.My mother bought the things we needed from the supermarket.We mixed the flour and eggs,then added some special things to make the cake soft.Finally,we put it into the oven.I shared the cake with my family members.It was really delicious.I will never forget that day.内容得分内容得分5The most unforgettable thing I11 My spoken English used to be very poor.I tried to improve it,but failed.So I told it to my English teacher and wished him to give me some advice.He told me that I could improve my spoken English by speaking more English.He said,The more you practice speaking English,the more progress you will make.Then I followed his advice and spoke as much English as possible.At last,my spoken English improved.My troubleWhat is missed in this article?1.What was your trouble in your study?(2)2.How did you face the trouble?(3)3.How did you feel after solving it?(2)内容得分内容得分5 My spoken English used to12 The environment is important to us all.We need fresh air,clean water and so on.There used to be many trees around us,the air was fresh and the river was clean,but now they disappeared for one reason or another and were replaced by dirty water and polluted air.Because of the terrible pollution,peoples health is getting worse and worse.Whats more,the green house effect is changing our climate,which may lead to even more serious situation.Environment around usWhat is missed in this article?1.What do you think of the environment around us?(4)2.As students,what should we do?(3)内容得分内容得分4 The environment is import13The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays.What do you think of this article?内容不全内容不全1.What was the thing you did in the winter holidays?(1)2.Give some descriptions about it,such as where/when/how /who,etc.(4)3.Why do you think its the most unforgettable thing you did?(2)The winter holidays are one of the most exciting holidays in the year.The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays is making a birthday cake with my mother on my birthday.My mother bought the things we needed from the supermarket.We mixed the flour and eggs,then added some special things to make the cake soft.Finally,we put it into the oven.I shared the cake with my family members.It was really delicious.I will never forget that day.内容得分内容得分5The most unforgettable thing I14 My spoken English used to be very poor.I tried to improve it,but failed.So I told it to my English teacher and wished him to give me some advice.He told me that I could improve my spoken English by speaking more English.He said,The more you practice speaking English,the more progress you will make.Then I followed his advice and spoke as much English as possible.At last,my spoken English improved.My troubleWhat is missed in this article?1.What was your trouble in your study?(2)2.How did you face the trouble?(3)3.How did you feel after solving it?(2)内容得分内容得分5 My spoken English used to15 The environment is important to us all.We need fresh air,clean water and so on.There used to be many trees around us,the air was fresh and the river was clean,but now they disappeared for one reason or another and were replaced by dirty water and polluted air.Because of the terrible pollution,peoples health is getting worse and worse.Whats more,the green house effect is changing our climate,which may lead to even more serious situation.Environment around usWhat is missed in this article?1.What do you think of the environment around us?(4)2.As students,what should we do?(3)内容得分内容得分4 The environment is import16Nowadays,our environment is becoming worse and worse.Our bad habits cause many problems like air pollution,land pollution and water pollution.To make our environment better,I want to be an environment protector.We can plant trees to make the air clean because trees can take in CO2 and release O2 into the air.We should buy and use environmentally friendly goods.Finally,we mustnt leave a lot of rubbish into the river,pond or sea.So lets be environment protectors and enjoy living a better life on the earth.I want to be an environment protectorNowadays,our environment is b17内容(内容(7分)分)+语言(语言(8分)分)+文采(文采(3分)分)一、认真审题,结构合理一、认真审题,结构合理*写什么写什么(题目,参考问题)题目,参考问题)*重点写什么重点写什么(提示问题)提示问题)内容(7分)+语言(8分)+文采(3分)一、认真审题,结构合18 Nowadays,there are many problems of our environment such as air pollution,water pollution and land pollution.People cut down and burn the forest.People use things once and throw them away.People use chemicals to produce many things.Because of these reasons,our earth is in great danger.We live on the earth,its our duty to protect it.I will do a lot of things so that I can protect the earth.For example,I will reuse the plastic bags.There are a lot of ways to be green consumers.I want to be an environment protectorUse the following points as a guide.(下列要点仅供参考)下列要点仅供参考)What are the problems of our environment?Why do you want to be an environment protector?What will you do to protect the environment?Nowadays,there are many 19 Everybody has many ways to make happy.So do I.First,I listen some favorite music.Second,I read some books and make some notes.I think it is good.Third,I play basketball with my friends.In my opinion,play basketball is the best way to make me happy,because I fond of it.Because of those,I become happy and strong.1.What are the ways to make you happy?2.Which way do you think is the best one to make you happy?3.Why do you feel happy in this way?(give at least two reasons)Everybody has many ways to20内容(内容(7分)分)+语言(语言(8分)分)+文采(文采(3分)分)一、认真审题,结构合理一、认真审题,结构合理*写什么写什么(题目,参考问题)题目,参考问题)*重点写什么重点写什么(提示问题)提示问题)*时态时态(参考问题)参考问题)”I want to be an environment protector(保护者保护者)”Use the following points as a guide.(下列要点仅供参考)下列要点仅供参考)What are the problems of our environment?Why do you want to be an environment protector?What will you do to protect the environment?内容(7分)+语言(8分)+文采(3分)一、认真审题,结构合21My trouble1.What was your trouble in your study?(2)2.How did you face the trouble?(3)3.How did you feel after solving it?(2)The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays.1.What was the thing you did in the winter holidays?(1)2.Give some descriptions about it,such as where/when/how /who,etc.(4)3.Why do you think its the most unforgettable thing you did?(2)Environment around us1.What do you think of the environment around us?(4)2.As students,what should we do?(3)My troubleWhat was your troub22二、理清思路,列出提纲二、理清思路,列出提纲Write a passage of at least 60 words on the topic”I want to be an environment protector(保护者保护者)”(以以”I want to be an environment protector”为题写一为题写一篇不少于篇不少于60个词的短文,标点符号不占格。个词的短文,标点符号不占格。)Use the following points as a guide.(下列要点仅供参考)下列要点仅供参考)1.What are the problems of our environment?2.Why do you want to be an environment protector?3.What will you do to protect the environment?二、理清思路,列出提纲Write a passage of 23Write at least 60 words about the topic The best way to make me happy.(以“最能使我快乐的方法”为题,写一篇不少于60个词的短文,标点符号不占格)The following points are for your reference:(所给提示仅供参考)1.What are the ways to make you happy?2.Which way do you think is the best one to make you happy?3.Why do you feel happy in this way?(give at least two reasons)Write at least 60 words about 24三、连词成句,初步成形三、连词成句,初步成形四、检查修改,内容无误四、检查修改,内容无误Environment is very important for us.In our life,the problems of our environment are very important.We have hurt it too much by cutting down trees and pollute water and land.I want to be a environment protector so that save it.Id suggest my parents to take bus instead of drive car.I will progress my habbits such as use a basket or a paper bag.I will prevent people throw rubbish everywhere.If everybody can do somethings to protect the earth,our environment will be much beautiful.I want to be an environment protector三、连词成句,初步成形四、检查修改,内容无误Environm25 The winter holidays are one of the most exciting days in the year.I did a lot of things this winter holidays.the most unforgetable thing is to make my birthday cake with my mother on my birthday.My mother buy the things we need from the supermarket.We mixed the floor and eggs.Then add some special things to make the cake soft.Finally,we put it into the iron.I shared the cake with my family numbers.It was really delicions.I will never forget that day because I learned to make cakes as well as share my happiness with others.The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays.What do you think of this article?错误太多错误太多10 The winter holidays are o26Find out the mistakes in the following sentences and correct them.1.I climed slowly and was very tried.2.I think it is an unforgetable thing because I helped sb.climbedtiredunforgettablesomebody3.On a friday afternoon,I went shopping with my mother.Spelling(拼写)(拼写)(others)Friday4.I cant forget that day.Because it is the last time we can celebrate her birthday together.I cant forget that day because5.What a crazy day it was,I will remember it forever.!Capital letter(大小写)(大小写)Punctuation(标点符号)(标点符号)Find out the mistakes in the f276.I will remembered that day forever.remember7.I thought it is hungry.was8.My grandmother always tidy up my room.tidies9.How unforgettable this things is!thingFind out the mistakes in the following sentences and correct them.Tense(时态)(时态)Verb agreement(主谓一致主谓一致)Word form(词形)词形)6.I will remembered that day 2810.In my fathers help,I became more patient than before.With my fathers help,11.To cut a long story to short,.To cut a long story short,12.I went to Shihua by a bus with my mother.by bus13.My mother told me dont give it up.told me not to give it upFind out the mistakes in the following sentences and correct them.Phrases(短语和固定搭配)短语和固定搭配)14.I saw an old lady lay in the middle of the road.saw an old lady lying10.In my fathers help,I bec2916.We played snow in front of house.played with15.I sat on a seat,listening music.listening to 17.Then a lady asked who had broken her window.We all were afraid.were allFind out the mistakes in the following sentences and correct them.Missing words(漏词)(漏词)18.We should do things by our own hands.withthe house19.It is tired work.tiringWords order(词序)(词序)Using wrong word(选词错误)(选词错误)16.We played snow in front of3022.He encouraged me to look for the watch by heart.carefully21.One Sunday morning,I went to Shihua by bus and sat beside me was a girl.I went to Shihua on a bus and there was a girl sitting beside me.Find out the mistakes in the following sentences and correct them.Chinese English(中式英语)(中式英语)In my life,many things happened.20.In my life have many things happened.22.He encouraged me to look f311.Environment is very important for us.2.In our life,the problems of our environment are very important.3.We have hurt it too much by cutting down trees and pollute water and land.4.I want to be a environment protector so that save it.5.Id suggest my parents to take bus instead of drive car.7.I will progress my habbits such as use a basket or a paper bag.8.If everybody can do somethings to protect the earth,our environment will be much beautiful.6.I will prevent people throw rubbish everywhere.to polluting in order to save it/so that I can save it take a bus instead of driving a car from throwing develop good habits using something much more beautifulserious an environment 1234.2567.18.14.17.28.21.Environment is very importan321.是否有大小写错误是否有大小写错误(capital letters or lowercase letters)2.是否有拼写错误是否有拼写错误(spelling mistakes)3.是否有标点错误是否有标点错误(punctuation mistakes)4.4.是否有语法错误是否有语法错误(grammar mistakes)主谓是否一致主谓是否一致 动词的时态动词的时态 语态的使用是否正确语态的使用是否正确 词组的搭配是否合乎习惯词组的搭配是否合乎习惯 Common Errors in English writing1.是否有大小写错误(capital letters or33 During the winter holidays,It happened a lot of things.One of the things was helpt a small girl to find her mother.When my friends and me shopping in a shopping mall,we saw a small girl cried in a corner.We asked what happened on her.She said she cuondt found her mother.So we started to helpt she to found her mother.Luckily,we found her mother,they were very happy and we were happy,too.I think it was the most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays because I found I also can help others.The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays.Check and correct this article.a lot of things happened.helpingIwere shoppingcryinghappened tocouldntfindhelp herfind.Theycould also,so During the winter holiday34 During the winter holidays,It happened a lot of things.One of the things was helpt a small girl to find her mother.When my friends and me shopping in a shopping mall,we saw a small girl cried in a corner.We asked what happened on her.She said she cuondt found her mother.So we started to helpt she to found her mother.Luckily,we found her mother,they were very happy and we were happy,too.I think it was the most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays because I found I also can help others.The most unforgettable thing I did in the winter holidays.a lot of things happened.helpingIwere shoppingcryinghappened tocouldntfindhelp herfind.Theycould also,so=97+2+0Comment on this article.1.What?(1)2.descriptions(4)3.Why(2)During the winter holiday35How should we check the passage?1.查主题,文章是否符合题目要求,内容是否完整。查主题,文章是否符合题目要求,内容是否完整。(check the theme)2.查语法,是否有时态错误,是否有主谓不一致,是否有查语法,是否有时态错误,是否有主谓不一致,是否有语态问题,是否有词形错误,是否有不合乎搭配的词组。语态问题,是否有词形错误,是否有不合乎搭配的词组。(check the grammar)查标点,是否有标点错误查标点,是否有标点错误 (check the punctuation)4.查拼写,是否有拼写错误和大小写问题查拼写,是否有拼写错误和大小写问题(check the spelling)5查表达,是否有不合乎英语惯用的表达,是否有中国式查表达,是否有不合乎英语惯用的表达,是否有中国式英语表达。英语表达。(check the ways of expression)Conclusion:How should we check the passag36五、遣词造句,争取文采五、遣词造句,争取文采考试手册上的词组考试手册上的词组常用的句型常用的句型 短语(上下连贯短语(上下连贯)逻辑关系的上下简单句逻辑关系的上下简单句-状语从句状语从句加加减减合合替替重复、可有可无的重复、可有可无的whats morein additionmore importantlyon the other handnot only but also 条件条件 if/unless因果因果 because结果结果 so that目的目的 so that让步让步 although,though比较比较 than,asas时间时间 when五、遣词造句,争取文采考试手册上的词组 短语(上下连贯)逻辑37 At school,sometimes I feel bad and sad because of the terrible things.If I came home but still feel bad,I will read some interesting books.It can make me forget the terrible things.The story in it also can bring me fun.I will listen to some songs too.These way are the best way to make me happy.At school,sometimes I fee38 listen to music,read different books and run can make me happy.I think read interesting books is the best one to make me happy.Because when I read books I can forget anything and when I think the story in book is amusing I will laugh.And after I read the book I will never feel sad.I think it is a good way.listen to music,read diff39 In my life,I often feel very tired.So I need some methods to relax myself and make me happy.For example,I usually go for a sleep and listen to some music.I think listening to music is fit of me.First,I make me forget things that make me unhappy.Second,I am interested in music.When I listen the music,I feel good.It brings me happiness.Thats why I feel happy in this way.In my life,I often feel v40 There are a lot of ways to make me happy.Such as listening to the music,playing the piano,reading books and so on.Reading books is the best on to make me happy.Reading books make me relax.I also learn a lot of interesting knowledge when I read a book.I feel happy in this way,because I like reading.There are a lot of ways to41结构(结构(7 7分)分)+内容(内容(8 8分)分)+文采(文采(3 3分)分)一、认真审题,结构正确一、认真审题,结构正确二、理清思路,列出提纲二、理清思路,列出提纲三、连词成句,初步成形三、连词成句,初步成形四、检查修改,内容无误四、检查修改,内容无误五、遣词造句,争取文采五、遣词造句,争取文采结构(7分)+内容(8分)+文采(3分)42
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